Thursday, October 24, 2013

Are you raising a Follower or a Leader?

Do we even know what we are doing wrong while we are doing it?
Parents have shied away from encouraging individuality, please don’t. Encourage your children to be Leaders, even if at times it means standing alone.
Let them know it is ok to have a difference of opinion but teach them how to share that difference in a respectful manner.

Encourage your children to want to do well alone but also to be ok with helping others excel.
Leader does not mean be a bully or to be bossy, it means to have them think for themselves and be proud of their thoughts.
Leaders work together with others to complete a task, not to bring one another down.
Leaders take the fall for their own thoughts, Followers fall because of others thoughts that they have followed.
Leaders stand for something and change the world. Followers go wherever the latest trends take them.

The topic of Leaders touches a nerve with me because I am the mother of a very independent young woman and because all her school life she has always been on the Leaders side both in academics and in sports yet, looked upon as different because she is a female.
It was very clear and present especially in her years of studying Tae Kwon Do. She was always either the only female or one of a few. So my teaching her to be ok with whom she was and to strive to always do her best came in very handy.
Unfortunately we live in a society that when a woman has power she can at times be labeled a Bitch. There are a few other labels but I will stick to one. Being any type of minority in any field is unfortunate period, which brings me to another label that I am having some issue with which is Bully.

I mention the term Bully in this post because I read the story about a Texas coach accused of bullying because his team beat another team 91-0 (sharing link).
Seriously, that is being a bully, to have a winning team? To have some children be great at something’s and others not, that is wrong? My child should feel bad that he or she is a winner a Leader?
I am not supposed to teach my child to be strong, independent, be a leader, and be good at something because my neighbor’s kid is going to feel bad or bullied?
How is this even possible?

Everyone is NOT a winner, bottom line. I have said this so many times. You either WIN or LOSE in a game, you either PASS or FAIL in a test. No rewards for participation that is life.
This news event should be a wake up call to everyone about being so quick to throw labels around and to start a conversation on why do some feel  being great at something and being proud of it an act of bullying?
For me I will always choose raising a Leader. I will always encourage my daughter to be the best at what she does and never be ashamed.

Which would you be most proud to raise? Should we be discouraged to raise Leaders in fear they will now be labeled Bullies? Is being a Follower the new norm?


  1. That is absurd, just because the other one worked hard and achieves something doesn't make him or her a bully. Bullies harasses and purposely try to hurt the other person, verbally, physically, or emotionally. Some people are just sissies and can't take losing well.

    1. VHW, thanks for the visit and comment. Winning and losing is all part of life might as well start learning early. Hope to see you again :)

  2. Good teachings, I taught my sons to be leaders and that it was also okay to lose as it builds character and makes them strive to do better. Too bad so many of today's youth will never learn that lesson and think they deserve everything to be handed to them!

    1. Antionette, thanks for visit and comment as always xo

  3. It is so true that a woman who is a leader will be labeled bitch. I know that first hand. No matter what I have been called I want my girls to be leaders. So, when peer pressure happens they will stand their ground. I can't believe people would call it bullying to be a winner or when standing your ground. Crazy.

    1. FM, thanks for visit and comments. Women have so many labels it is extremely important to continue to stay strong and supportive. Hope to see you again :)


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