Thursday, February 26, 2015

Chicken Thighs stewed in Teriyaki & Brown Sugar

March is just around the corner and I am so happy about that. Totally over this Winter. Between looking for parking, trying not to slip, wearing the same winter boots for past month and not being able to really go and hang out outside I am counting the days till Spring for sure.

I have a few things I am currently working on that require a huge bulk of my time so surely I don't want to invest to much time in my kitchen.
Last night I decided I would make something quick with Chicken Thighs. So this morning just before I left to work I took a pack out and left it to thaw out.

Thursday's treat!
Chicken Thighs stewed in Teriyaki & Brown Sugar 

ingredients:
-chicken thighs /no fat
-teriyaki sauce
-brown sugar
-small potatoes (optional)
-green salad (optional)


Wash and then season chicken pieces to your taste. I prefer the extra kick of sweetness so I sprinkle a little extra. Make sure you have mixed into a sauce consistency not watery!
Place a medium pot on stove to heat at medium setting then add 2 tablespoons of oil, I use olive oil or canola and 1 tablespoon of brown or regular sugar till it begins to caramelize.
When that begins to happen I carefully add the chicken pieces, pour about a cup of water and cover.

Lower flame slightly, making sure water isn't boiling to quickly this is what helps meat cook thoroughly and makes it tender.
Watching that water doesn't totally cook down, check after about 20 minutes, flip chicken pieces to other side add a bit more water if needed and cover again.
The water isn't suppose to be soupy, the idea is to stew and create a sauce.

After 30 minutes check with a fork for tenderness and thorough cooking of your meat.
If you are satisfied, turn off stove set aside. If you aren't add a little more water, flip pieces again and cover for a few more minutes.

I baked some small potatoes and cut up some lettuce on the side but you can have this with rice or even pasta.

Total time for me was around 45 minutes just because you want to make sure the meat is cooked properly and the water with the meat juices turns into a sauce consistency.
Enjoy!

Always stress free xo.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Should I throw only Same Sex Birthday parties for my children?

Hello my lovelies, you already know my shares come from experience or observation.
While on my grandma duties a few days ago one of her old home attendants came to pay her a visit which she loved.
As they chatted it up I went about my biz, folding laundry, sorting mail etc. something made me stop and eaves drop on the conversation, something the home attend said.
Back ground she is very very "old school", meaning no sex before marriage, one boyfriend and marriage type. So she commented that her son was turning fifteen and she was going to have a house party for him with a few friends. No problem right, wrong she said no girls could come because you know what could happen.

At which point Mari (me lol) walks out the room and says "oh but doesn't he go to school with girls?"
Of course the answer was yes but her rational was anything can happen in an apartment. Geez I couldn't walk away fast enough because of course my almost ninety-two year old grandma agreed. I felt like I was trapped in the stone age. It made me recall an old post I wrote which I am including here.
Tell me what you think.


Repost:

When I encounter something that I have never experienced I try and am trying to stay open and look at all perspectives.  Parenting is a tricky journey and some of the things that I have come across in my 18 years on this road have caused me to pause or just plain laugh out loud. I realize that age and upbringing have a lot to do with the way some of us choose to parent. This being said, I have a story to share.

I was invited to a friend of a friend daughter’s 11th birthday party a few days ago. It was held at one of those Fun zone type places. Everything was set up beautifully and we had a great time. So what is the problem right? Well the “problem” I found was that her whole class was invited, minus the boys.
The following day when I spoke with my friend I asked “Why were there no boys at yesterday’s party?” She replied that the parents didn't feel comfortable with the boys around.
Really? Don’t the boys already go to school with them? Don’t they spend at least 8 hours together a day? Don’t they have lunch and recess together?

I found the split to be silly. I saw no reason for it. We don’t live in a single sex society. We engage daily with the opposite sex. At 11 years old our children should know what proper behavior is. We as parents need to teach and reinforce, then see how things go. Not use separation as a means to “try” and solve a problem that may not even exist. I was confused as to what year this was. I mean my mom was a bit of a pain when it came to boys but even she was “Modern” to some degree for her time.

Do you think that child felt sad some of her classmates could not attend? Do you think she will have many friends if her parents continue to split her parties up or any other activities? Do you think she felt embarrassed?
Was there a reason to feel uneasy in the first place?

Ok so two stories almost two years apart, same idea do these parents have valid reason for such extreme or is that totally outdated? Is there a better way to handle this and what would they be?
Start a conversation.

Always stress free xo.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Goodbye February Turn it Up Tuesday

Goodbye February, hello March! Looking forward to great things this coming month. Thank you for always making this party such a blast. Let's get started.

Welcome to the 75th week of Turn It Up Tuesday! Last week, we had an awesome time on Turn It Up Tuesday with 457 links - it's our best best week ever! We'd like to thank each and every one of you for making every week so amazing! Keep sharing your amazing posts with us here on Turn It Up Tuesday!

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Turn It Up Tuesdays is all about being happy, excited, energetic...and having fun! Link up your favorite posts (old or new) and meet some awesome bloggers in return! Link up your funny stories, DIY posts, recipes, mommy moments -- anything at all. We want to laugh, be entertained, be inspired, and have a good time!
Thanks so much to everyone that joins us each week and makes this blog hop the best that it could be!

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Andrea Keeney is a writer, blogger, mother, and wife. She is the creator of the blog, Parenting with Parents as well as the author of the book, Moms: As Elite as the C.I.A….Well Almost. When she isn’t pursuing her dreams of writing she is taking care of her three small children.
Attention! There is an elite group of women walking freely among the average citizens of the world. These freakishly instinctive beings are capable of physical, mental, and emotional acts of greatness. They tend to appear irritated, exhausted, and are almost always bombarded by very tiny renegades who are whining and/or yelling. These women come in many shapes and sizes, however they all respond to a single name: Mom. If you know one of these women, if you are one of these women, or if you are going to be one of these women, you need this book!
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Welcome the lovely ladies of Turn It Up Tuesday!

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TUT hosts 2.15.15 - 2
(from the top - left to right)
Natasha from Epic Mommy Adventures | Stacey from This Momma's Ramblings | Jessica from The Wondering Brain | Cathy from A Peek Into My Paradise | Rhonda from Mother 2 Mother | Jillian from Baby Doodah | April from April Noelle | Tina from The Happy Creations | Melissa from The Coupon Chronicles | Cindy from Mom Maven | Tiffany from MrsTeeLoveLifeLaughter | Kelly from Making-More | Yolanda from That's Mashed Up | Tenns from New Mama Diaries | Silvie from My Silly Little Gang | Mari from Living in Mommywood | Rose from What Rose Knows | Kimberly from Keystrokes by Kimberly | Chelsea from Mommie and Wee | Nancy from Afro-Chic Mompreneur | Zografia from Bisozozo | Elaine from Ramblings of a Bad Domestic Goddess

And welcome our awesome guest hosts for February!

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(from the top - left to right)
Danielle from insearchofthe25thhour | Cathy from Brand New Mom Blog | Latisha from Ask Latisha | Alyssa from Life from My Laptop | Lisa from Blogghetti | Kelly from Mum-bo-Jumbo | Kim from Life in a House of Testosterone | Sarah from Pretty Simple Ideas

Interested in being a guest host for the month or becoming a permanent co-host?

Complete the form here! Monthly co-hosts will be chosen on a first come first-serve basis.

Here are the Featured posts from last week!

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Rhonda chose Free Printable: Donut Thank You Gift Tags from Happiness is Homemade. "These thank you notes are adorable. I love how they have a bite taken out of them. They're the perfect way to say thank you."

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Cindy chose 5 Books That Changed My Life and Marriage from Stuck in Your Rut. "In this honest post the author shares about tough times in her past and some books that helped her move through those times and become a better person. I am always on the lookout for well written Christian marriage books so I appreciated what was shared in this post."

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Cindy also chose The Laundry Reveal from Inspiration for Moms. "I am dreaming of an addition to my home, which at this point we have no budget for. the addition would include enlarging the kitchen, moving the laundry room and reconfiguring a bedroom to include an en suite. I have spent a lot of time looking at laundry room designs and I like some of the aspects in this one."

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Tina chose So I Crocheted a Horse… from Busy Being Jennifer. "What a cute crocheted horse stufie!! Adorable horse!! Makes you want to learn how to crocket. Thanks for sharing!"

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Tina also chose 11 Essential Oils You Need in Your Medicine Cabinet from Domain of the Mad Mommy. "I'm not an essential oils expert but I'm a new fan, I love this post,very informative and helpful especially for someone who wants to start using essential oils. Thanks for sharing."
Elaine also chose this post. "I picked this one because I am interested in learning more about essential oils."

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Cathy chose Slow Cooker Cranberry Apple French Toast from Dizzy Busy & Hungry! "My family loves breakfast for dinner too! Fast, easy and delicious - and even better made in the crockpot for the summer months!"
Silvie also chose this post. "This was my favorite because I love slow cooker recipes and I love desserts, so this one was definitely a win/win for me. :)"

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Cathy also chose Family Holiday Ideas: Peanut Butter and Graham Crackers from Kenarry. "Oh my! I can’t wait to make this dessert for my family! I predict it will be a favorite!"

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Jillian chose 7 Grammatical Mistakes Bloggers Need to STOP Making from Belle Brita. "I chose this post because the errors that she mentions, are ones that also annoy me, when I see other bloggers make them. :)"
Latisha also chose this post. "Even though I find that the writer’s tone seems a little bit harsh. I like this article because it offers errors and the correct use of some regularly used words in blog post to look for when writing post. I will try to be more attentive when editing my post and look out for these errors specifically."

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Jillian also chose How to market your small business for free from Kokoa Magazine. "I chose this post because I am working on growing my small business and am always looking for new and different tips."

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Mari chose Citrus Salad from Spoonful of Flavor. "I chose Ashley's Citrus Salad because it's so refreshing, colorful and healthy. Not something we see or even think about often enough."

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Mari chose 20 Easy Meals with Shrimp from Growing Up Gabel. "I also chose Brenna's Easy meals with Shrimp because I love easy meals always and Shrimps are fantastic both hot or cold."

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Lisa chose Zuppa Toscana from Budget Girl. "Chelsey's Zuppa Toscana Soup looks amazing and it's one of my favorite soups at Olive Garden. I love the fact I can make it at home and her recipe is a cinch to make. She adds a few tips what you can add to the soup to personalize but like her, I like it just the way it is. The soup takes no time to prepare and to cook, that's my kind of meal!"

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Lisa also chose 15 Books You Should Read In 2015 from Logan Can... "I chose Logan'a post on 15 Books You Should Read in 2015 simply because I am always, always looking for MORE books to read and these all sound great. Can't wait to get them all."

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Sarah chose DIY Kids Play Makeup from Simply {Darr}ling. "It's so cute and realistic - and yet without the mess! I have three nieces that would love this."

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Sarah also chose Vanilla Cinnamon Mug Cake from Organized Island. "It's a perfect and SUPER QUICK dessert for one person. Just the bite you need to satisfy a sweet tooth without going overboard.

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Cathy chose Silent Grief: Aradhana's Story from Made to Mother. "Wynter from Madetomother.com writes a blog post entitled, 'Silent Grief-Aradhana's Story'. She divulges her deepest emotions during a very difficult time many mom's are too hurt to talk about, miscarriage. Her cander and bravery for telling her story is empowering."

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Cathy also chose Crochet Baby Gifts: Afghan and Amigurumi Bunny Set from Over the Apple Tree. "Laura from Over the Apple Tree made the cutest crochet bunny and afghan. Her step by step tutorial makes it seem worth delving into! She is so on point when she says there is nothing like a homemade gift!"

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Latisha chose Random & Helpful Kitchen & Cooking Tips from Just Misty. "I like this blog post because it consist of very useful kitchen tips. My favorite tip being what to do if you accidently add too much salt or sugar to your meal. This post could save a lot of ruined dishes. Really cool."

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Stacey chose 7 Reasons Why Exercise Sucks from The Pinterested Parent. "This was amazing! I felt myself nodding, chuckling and offering a great big "Oh Yeah" on all seven points! Thank you so much for sharing!"

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Kelly chose Shamrock Wreath from Crafty Journal. "I love paper crafts and this is such an easy craft to make for St Patrick's Day. I think the glitter makes a nice touch."

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Kelly chose Southwest Salad in a Jar from Sunny with a Chance of Sprinkles. "I have been behind the eight ball on the mason jar craze but this is such a great idea and one I know I will do!"

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Danielle chose "Little Love Nest" Kissing Booth from What Happens at Grandma's. "It's my favorite because it's literally the cutest thing I've ever seen. I mean I have no words. The kiddos in it are adorably perfect too!"
April chose Organize Your Digital Life: Pinterest! from So Domestically Challenged. "When I started my Pinterest board, I just pinned... finding a place for everything. Now that I'm trying to work my site more as a business, my Pinterest boards are a completely mess. Christine gives some tips, including where to get started, which I definitely need!"

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The post with the most clicks is Winter Home Maintenance Checklist: Free Printable from Kenarry.
Stop by and show some love to our featured bloggers this week! I'm sure they'd all appreciate it!
If you were featured above, feel free to share the badge below with pride on your blog or website!

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And the Best of the Best is...

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Show some love to our Best of the Best bloggers this week!!!!
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So now that you've met our Sponsor for the month, our hosts and guest hosts, our Featured, the Best of the Best, and our giveaways,

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*Show some love to your hosts and co-hosts simply by following them on social media and leaving a comment so they can follow you back. *Link up as many posts as you'd like! The more, the merrier! *Check out some of the other posts and make some new friends! *Grab the button below and showcase on your sidebar! Invite your fellow bloggers to join the fun!

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Sunday, February 22, 2015

Cutting or Self Injury Yetti's story, a Guest Post

Hello lovelies!
Strap yourselves in because today's topic is not a light one. In fact it is very real, very raw and hopefully very informative.
This is a subject matter I came across by wonderful accident. As I have shared before I follow many Blogs that cover numerous topics. Fashion, Self Help, Education, Politics and of course Parenting just to name a few.
I came across this post and felt an instant need to reach out to the writer and spread her words.

The subject matter is Cutting or Self Injury/Self Harm as it is also referred to.
The writer I am speaking of is Yetti who blogs over at yettisays.com. She is a twenty something year old living in NYC and I felt her story needed to be shared in order to understand, possibly help and to definitely start a conversation.


Though I have heard some talk on this issue and my daughter has also shared some stories and info with me in the past, I really can't say I know or knew anything specific about it.
After I read Yetti's post and she expressed the lack of deeper information on this matter I reached out to her and asked her if she would be willing to do a Q&A with me.
She graciously said yes and this is what we would like to share...

Yetti welcome to Mommywood, please share a little about yourself. So far we know you live in NYC and are twenty something. What are a few other things you would like to share about yourself? I am passionate about all things related to self-love, understanding one’s thought process and post-it notes. I don’t drink alcohol, whatsoever, and I am a little bit of a homebody.

What bought you to the Blogsphere? I was brought to the blogging world when I was 15, when I basically turned to the Internet for friends. My parents are Nigerian, so they didn’t necessarily believe in the whole teenage socializing scene, so what started as writing fan-fiction turned into blogging / journaling online. While in college I blogged under a pen name but returned with AndSoSheWrites.com, where I used my actual name while asking the blogsphere to hold me accountable during my weight-loss journey. 

What attracted me to your Blog was the rawness of your language and the topics you touch. The words seem to be an extension of yourself and your beliefs. Did you find it difficult to stay true to yourself while still hoping to connect with a wider audience? I did. I most definitely did! It’s why I rebranded my blog to “YettiSays” last year February. In high-school, I blogged about the things that I thought were cool. You know, boys I liked, boys I was secretly dating behind my parent’s back, and all the celebrities I was able to meet from working with a local TV show. I think at some point, I even denounced the fact that I was African. In college, my blog was there for my sanity. I mainly wrote about my struggles with self-mutilation, depressing thoughts and falling so very hard in love for the first time and being scared out of my damn mind.

When ASSW.com came around, it was different. My audience grew fairly quickly, and it happened to reach folks my parents worked with. For the first time, I had to be extremely cautious of what I decided to share with the world. And the more it grew, the more I felt obligated to write about certain things, and stifle the growth I was experiencing until one day I looked through my posts and realized that they were not how I wanted myself to be represented. I didn’t see myself completely in all of my posts.
 So I rebranded. And “YettiSays” is all me. And it’s accepted… most of the time.

So as I shared with my readers I reached out to you because of a very personal post you wrote referencing Self Injury or Cutting. Can you share with us how this came to be a part of your life for a time? At what age did you start? My self-mutilation addiction started around the age of 14. From what therapists have deduced and just from what I know about myself, it was caused by constantly wanting perfection and used as punishment to myself when I didn’t achieve it. And not only perfection according to myself, but to others too. If I disappointed myself, if I disappointed others, those were both grounds to harm myself.

How did the people around you react once they found out? Did they help or hinder your mental state at the time? I think it was a combination of shock, care, and a great deal of confusion. I was generally a happy person [from the outside], so it shocked people to know I suffered from a level of depression. But most of everyone that found out, wanted to fix the problem. Sometimes out of care, and sometimes from embarrassment. 

What were some of your specific triggers? Did it progress with time? As stated before, anything that teetered along the lines of disappointment, gearing me to further dislike myself.

What event allowed you the clarity to stop Cutting and begin healing? What steps did you take to show yourself love and kindness? Accepting other people’s love for me kind of made me have an “aha” moment. It’s different when it’s family, they’re supposed to care and love you. But my best-friend, aimed to understand why I did it, and without judging me, she did her very best to talk to me without added pressure. I don’t even think she realizes how much of a postive impact that was. I also was in a relationship, long distance at the time. We were both studying abroad. And there was a Skype conversation had where at the end of the convo. he said something along the lines of being afraid most evenings that I was going to do something terrible to myself. That’s extremely hard to hear from the person, at that point, you thought you would potentially marry.

The first step was to understand the root and to surround myself with people who would support me. The rest didn’t really take place until 2 to 3 years later when I developed a better understanding of my thought processes and why they headed in the direction of self-harm.


 The research I found spoke on Cutting being a psychological issue, having routes in abuse and not necessarily related to wanting to commit suicide? What do you think about those statements? What do you wish was known more of in regards to Cutting? I think those statements could very well be valid, but I can’t necessarily pin them to my own personal experience. What I will say is, a child’s belief system is built at a very young age. Extremely young age. It really is up to parents to help their child form a healthy one. I think often times parents think that if they coddle their child, and give them everything at arms reach, it’ll lead there child in the right direction, but that has the ability to backfire terribly.

My parents taught me to be independent at a young age. My father told me if I could put my mind to it, I could accomplish everything and anything. But they also lacked in positive reinforcement, which cultivated the root to most of my insecurities, the thought, “I am not enough.”

But if it wasn’t for the independence, and the thought that I can do anything if I worked hard, I don’t think I would have eventually mustered up the strength and will to fight back against that self-deprecating thought.
 Cutting is an addiction. Sure, it’s cry for help, but it also becomes one of those automatic notions to one’s life. To how one deals. Simply stopping the action will not solve anything, you need to reverse the thoughts that trigger the action. 

Is there anything anyone could have done to help you coup with matters differently? Not really, it was pretty much up to me; I had everything else I needed.

Your post made mention of 2012 being your last slip up, can you share with us the tools you used to recover at the time? What are the tools you use daily to stay focused on a healthier path? Therapy. When you can uncover the true reason behind why you’re cutting it makes it easier to logically talk yourself out of it. It doesn’t happen overnight though, like at all. My favorite tools are:
  • -          Meditation to slow your thoughts down, followed by thought-stopping. Most of the time we let the inner bully that lives within our heads dictate how we view ourselves. When our minds are not going a mile a minute, we can eventually combat the negative self-talk with truthful statements.
  • -          Positive Affirmations to reprogram those ugly thoughts (hence my love for post its)
 Yetti, I want to thank you once again for allowing me the time and for sharing your story. Is there anything else you would like to share with my readers before we wrap up? There is always the option to get it right, there will always be a road to recovery. You just have to want it, and decide upon it. For yourself.
 Yetti, of yettisays.com, provides the average twenty-something-year old with their daily dose of vitamin-y: the uncensored truth sometimes served with a side of wit, sarcasm, and a few curse words. You can follow her on twitter @yettisays.

So here you have it, hope it has been eye opening and informative. Hope that Yetti's honesty can help someone if possible or that you can pass this on to someone who can benefit from the information.

Please don't forget to visit her page for more uplifting shares.
I am including some links with great information. Don't forget the best tool of all as parents is our mouths. Start a conversation, communicate with love and kindness, be supportive, listen and learn.

Always stress free xo.

webmd.com
kidshealth.org