Sunday, November 1, 2015

Hello! Listen to me

When your inner voice speaks...learn to listen.
Another great comment that popped out at me from my themindfulnesssummit. I am just so glad I joined this summit in October. It was a comment that came out of Arianna Huffington's mouth. I am not gaining any perks by dropping names or links I just found the info to be awesome and very encouraging something that could be implemented in our daily lives.

At a time where most shares are breaking people down and have useless value I am always energized by inspiring words. Some people are very quick to knock down the mere thought of self help books, classes or videos but I say the more options I have the better and sometimes talking to a friend just isn't good enough. Most times it is actually listening to ourselves that will save us.

illustration by friendburst.com

I've gotten much better at this over the years but in the past I use to shove my inner voice to the side and for that I apologize. I knew she was right but the imaginary lawyer in me wanted to prove her wrong.

Facts are facts and no amount of words or sugar coating can change that. Here is a share about me.

Fact...I ask a lot of questions sometimes or perhaps not a lot of questions just questions that make others uncomfortable. My intent isn't to cause tension my intent is to clarify and come to a conclusion.

I haven't learned my lesson yet on how to allow others to talk and I just listen and if I'm uncomfortable I have to deal with it not them. Sometimes I find that I know it isn't the right moment to speak but I do anyway in hopes of a different outcome. That is the definition of crazy....doing the same thing expecting a different result.

It's like an out of body experience you are present in the moment, you are listening and fully aware that you just shouldn't say anything that you should just be quiet and listen but before you know it your mouth is open and the verbal diarrhea has begun. For me its been something I have dealt with for many years. As I have gotten older and through my practice of Meditation and Mindfulness I have come to accept it as a character flaw and am working on ways to better myself.

illustraion by medimanage.com

This is where listening to my inner voice has become a priority and hearing it mentioned in a speech hit home. Because if I don't begin to correct this now, when then? What line do I have to cross before I check myself? And this is not just about me not minding my words at times but it can be said about any one of us who find ourselves in situations where we are not listening to our inner voice and could even be putting ourselves in harms way both mentally or physically.

Our inner voice is there to protect us, its the stop sign, its the red flag its the siren getting closer and closer and louder and louder. Listen to it!

Even when the things it is saying are negative and we feel hurt by them it is still there to stop us, to slow us down and force us to have a conversation with ourselves. I have started to use the following tools to check myself:
-take 3 deep breaths
-stop talking
-take a break(don't rush into anything)
-excuse yourself(remove yourself then revisit)
-make a list(mental or on paper of pros & cons)
-role play(put yourself in other person's shoes or in scenario you are considering)
-listen as if your life depended on it (something I read somewhere) because someday that may be the case

illustration by whereisbjfromm.blogspot

So now that you know I have poor listening skills aside from the tools I am starting to use what else can you share with me to make me a better Listener? Help me fire this imaginary lawyer.

Always stress free xo
Mari

16 comments:

  1. I am the same way! More often than not, it's an open mouth, insert foot type of situation! I have also been working on learning to really listen to others, as well as to my inner voice. Hopefully we both master this soon!

    Thank you for sharing with us at #mommymeetupmondays!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you so much for your honestly and truth, I love to follow your post keep on telling it like it is from your perspective I will pay much closer attention to the "inner voice"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well glad to hear that John, thanks again for stopping by and commenting. Sometimes the answers are right in front of us and we just keep fighting them.

      Delete
  3. Good listening skills are so important, as it taking a break to calm down when needed.

    Thanks for sharing at Turn It Up Tuesday

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Hil! thanks for joining us on TIUT!

      Delete
  4. Great steps. I think it is important that we are aware of our weaknesses as well as our strengths. It is the only way we can change and grow.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Crystal thanks for stopping by and commenting hope to see you here again :)

      Delete
  5. I used to be a good listener till I started blogging...lol. Now whenever one of my kids comes into my room to talk to me, I have to physically tear myself away from the screen. And I have been making a point of doing this otherwise I end up doing nothing, I cannot concentrate on the screen and I only half listen to what my kids tell me... very bad. The other kind of listening you refer to I have no problem with, only that there is too much of it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mary thanks for stopping by and commenting it's great at least you aware of how your listening skills are functioning. Hope to chat again real soon:)

      Delete
  6. Thanks for linking up to Pin Worthy Wednesday, I have pinned your post to the Pin Worthy Wednesday Pinterest Board.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Just turned 40 this week and it's part of my 2017 resolutions to listen to myself better and be more mindful. Thanks for the great post at #trafficjamweekend

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Zoe welcome glad you liked the post. So important to implement self care in our lives. Thanks for visit and hope to chat again soon :)

      Delete
  8. Words have power. Slowing down is a strategy that works for me. Thanks for sharing, Mari!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lori thanks for stopping by appreciate Comment :)

      Delete

I believe in freedom of speech but not at the expense of others. Please don’t confuse that with bashing, use of foul language or total disrespect of others.

Feel free to comment, post, share your own experience and ask questions all in a respectful manner. I welcome debates. Feel free to disagree and express it if you so wish but again always with respect to others. I am sure we can find ways to express our opinions without a shouting match or bullying.

I reserve the right to delete any content left on my blog that I deem not respectful to myself or others. Again we all have freedom of expression but this is my blog. By posting a comment on my blog you grant me the right to use, display, publish, reproduce, transmit and distribute your comment in any manner is see fit in the future i.e. books, video or presentation.

My goal is to host a caring, honest and respectful environment. A place where parents can have an interesting exchange with one another.