How Motherhood may change Us

-You will never get your figure back

-You will always need more sleep

-You may develop bladder problems

-Your house will be a mess

-You will not be interested in sex

-Your boobs will sag

-You will always feel tired and in a bad mood

-You will never have time for yourself

This is only a short list of the few things we women here or have already heard in reference to the changes we will go through upon having a baby. Just on our Social Media alone we see share after share on body expectations, nursing expectations, beauty expectations so much pressure that it seems the joy is lost. Seems like to some degree women continue to focus on the negatives and not the positives once the baby is home from the hospital.

illustration by corcell.com

Women let's join together to change our perspective and the perspective of this sometimes unbalanced society we live in after all we did just bring another Human Being into this world.
Let's try instead to prepare for these possible changes in the following way:

• Once we are able to walk around, let’s go for walks with the baby. This will help with weight loss in a healthy manner, it will help you get out the house and even meet other new moms.
• If sleep issues arise, nap when baby naps.
• For sagging breast prevention purchase the proper support.
• Recruit friends and family to help with home care if needed. Learn time management. Babies don't need to be held all day long so break down your chores accordingly. Organization and time management are critical to smooth parenting.
• If you need to schedule time with your partner, do it. Once you have recuperated and doctor says all is fine, begin to share intimate moments with your partner at a pace you feel comfortable with. But don't begin to neglect your relation. It is not healthy for either one of you, and intimacy is more than just sex.
• When the baby is sleeping, napping or just relaxing take some time for yourself to just relax as well. Don’t always use this time to catch up on other things or to complete tasks. Even twenty minutes of just sitting can refresh you.
• YOU ARE NOT A BAD PARENT IF YOU NEED TIME FOR YOURSELF.  Again recruit trusted people in your life to come in and relieve you of the baby for half hour or an hour and go out and do things alone. You will both be better off for it.

illustration by momjunction.com

Can you think of other ways we can remove the negative energy and embrace the changes in a positive light? How did you deal with your changes or how do you think you will deal with the changes when the time comes? Share your views.

Always stress free xo,

Mari

Breast feeding

Happy Hump day, hope my post ignites plenty of chatter :)

I've wanted to write about this subject for a very long time now but every time I sat to write I was not able to be clear on my thoughts or even in the direction I wanted to go.
I have A LOT to say on this matter both due to my own experience with it and because of all I have seen and heard throughout the years.

Our thought process sometimes go back to our childhood, things we recall, smells, flashes of memories that come about when we experience something. At times it can feel like Deja vu.

As a child of the 70’s I never saw a mother Breast feed outside of the privacy of an enclosed space that is first of all. Secondly, I never heard a mother complain or even comment on her experience. It was “natural”. It was what it was, almost ALL mothers Breast feed unless they couldn't for some reason and even that wasn't really discussed.

My mother had 2 babies in the 80’s and she Breast feed again, the usual. No one made comments or shared experiences because it was just part of the package.

Here I come in the 90’s having my daughter and “TALKING” about “EVERYTHING”. Breast pumps, lotions, special bras, pain, cracked skin, leaking, full breast, arousal, nipple soreness, what the milk “TASTE” like, how my partner feels about my Breast, more soreness, more pain, how long should I Breast feed, should I do both Breast and regular milk, should I keep going even if it hurts, how to store the milk, best method of pumping milk out, how often…the “TALKS” were endless.

My girlfriends and I Breast feed in front of one another but NEVER out in public or without finding a place to cover ourselves at.  We would use restrooms or go back to our cars or excuse ourselves from wherever we were if in public.

Hit 2000’s and I am bombarded by Breast feeding in restaurants, parks, doctor’s office and so forth. I am reading about not only the ups and downs of Breast feeding but how it’s my duty as a mother to Breast feed. I am supposed to provide my child with the most natural resource of nutrition. I am supposed to Breast feed for x amount of time I am supposed to have the right to expose my boobs anywhere I chose because my baby needs to feed.

Sorry, I disagree. I have the RIGHT to do with MY body as I wish. I have the RIGHT to listen to my body whether it’s because it’s unable to perform certain acts due to pain or just by choice. I have the RIGHT to sit at a PUBLIC place and NOT be imposed on by another MOTHER'S CHOICE.

No business should be sued because they didn't provide me with a changing table or place to sit and breast feed. No kid friendly zone should be called out in a magazine or on the news because they asked a mother to cover up.
I would think these are just common courtesies. I mean smokers have to go outside now to smoke. They can’t impose their life choice on me.

Obviously I’m a mom, I love being a mom and I have an enormous respect for women and for freedom of choice. I am supportive of all things to help empower women as a whole. I have a daughter that I have raised to be strong, independent and loving.

This being said Breast feeding is a CHOICE.

I am including a link to a story I ran into a while ago and saved because I hoped to at some point to write on this subject.

http://www.cafemom.com/group/115189/forums/read/18870998/Breastfeeding_in_public_THIS_is_what_makes_me_angry?email_id=876860930&utm_medium=cmi&utm_source=cafemom&utm_campaign=General&utm_content=daily_newsletter&utm_nooverride=1

Let’s start a conversation? Is it wrong of me to Not want to see a strangers boob while I eat? Is it wrong or unreasonable of businesses not to accommodate a mom? What other accommodations are mothers missing out on, if any?