google-site-verification: google25a08fc65649193e.html Living in Mommywood: Who is Responsible? The Race Cards are on the Table

Sunday, May 3, 2015

Who is Responsible? The Race Cards are on the Table

Happy Sunday to all, I will be enjoying another beautiful sunny day here in NYC but I wanted to leave you with something to think about today. If we continue to not learn from the past, what future will we really have?

Today I went for a walk after work. It was my first walk of the year, this winter was a mess totally kept me working out indoors.
I love my walks, they allow my thoughts to flow freely just like the breeze flows freely above, beyond and through the trees. During my walk I was overcome by a sadness and a realization that I had never honored before.

As I watched young and old, women and men and a vast mixture of races all walking among themselves I had a huge question come to mind. Now I want to be clear...these are my thoughts and I want to share them with respect.That my purpose in every word I write, every post I share is to start a conversation. To provoke questions, thoughts, understanding, some more questions and some more thoughts that all lead to talks. This was a bit difficult for me to address but here it goes.

I am a minority woman of Hispanic decent. Even using these words gets tricky if you look at Wikipedia. I am caramel skin in completion, I was born in the United States but my family comes from the Dominican Republic, a Caribbean Island next to Haiti. They came here by choice, to build a better life because their homeland was a poor country. Their dreams or at least for some of them was to build and return to their country. That choice afforded me the life I have today, the life I've lived and the freedoms I've experienced. But, as I read the papers, watch the news and talk with my daughter I see another reality.

illustration by viartis.com

I see a reality of a certain group of people who were taken from their homes, had no say in the matter, were ripped away from loved ones and bought to another country to do the work that lazy people didn't want to do. Again I will repeat myself...taken away from their country forced to do the lazy man's work. Not approached as humans with an offer of a better life, not with an option to say no and not with an option to say yes and be treated humanely.

Why is no one thinking about that in this day and age? Why is no one owning up to that most important fact to the fullest extent all these years later? Again I repeat...taken away from their country. Then! when perhaps a chance has presented itself to gain some dignity gain some respect some equality it is met with death, destruction, more humiliation and no humanity. Why? Why are so few disturbed by this and so many quick to shrug off and walk away?

Why is my skin color less than or worth less than another? Why am I a minority? Why am I not the right type for your standards? And why are your standards the norm? I ask why am I because in the world I apparently live in I am either White or Black. And though my history is not of those that were taken from their land I feel a connection to their poor treatment and blatant disrespect. Today I am a voice for that story.

How can nothing have changed in so many years? Why do some feel they are still better than others? Why can I see small children all play together with no concept of differences but somehow they have parents who feel the need to focus on that and then point it out? Why are the young so accepting and the old so bitter?

illustration by theunrecordedman.wordpress.com

To find the music, the clothes, the culture as a whole acceptable to mimic and follow but not the actual people is disturbing to say the least. To use a variety of tools to make yourselves look a "certain" way but again not accept those of us who actually look this way is madness.

Are we not the same, really? If your child needed a heart transplant or a kidney would you reject it and watch them die because it didn't come from a person with the "right" skin color or background? If three teens died in a car crash and burned, would they not all look the same until they were identified through their teeth?!!! If your spouse was in distress would you not want them to be helped by whoever was the closest? Would you really tell that person of a different color or background to leave your loved one to suffer?

This is the reality...that backwards thinking that some peoples ancestors had many moons ago and bought to our way of living is wrong and inhumane. It was wrong when they took people from their homes then and it is wrong now when people are being shot and killed right in front of our faces. Who is responsible? Who is going to step up? Who or what is going to stop this? No one is better than...we literally are all the same. If I am to throw religion into this and so many of us are always praising the "Lord" are we not made in his image? Did he make a mistake? Was he wrong when he choose to use different shades, forms etc...to make his people?

illustration by jezebel.com

I am a mother, a good mother in the sense I strive to teach my child respect and love and kindness to all. In the sense that I raised my child to do her best and work hard. I am a mother figure to anyone who needs it. The kid next door, the kids in the park, the kids in the shelter I volunteer at. I am a mother. No one should ever feel they have the right to tell me my daughter is less than. No one should look at my daughter and see less than. But some do, because of her skin color because of her hair because of her background. Am I furious? of course, wouldn't you if your child was thought of as less than?

So I challenge us today, every mom who reads this to look at their child or their loved ones for that matter and imagine them being looked upon or treated as less than. It starts with one change, one thought, one light! Shine brightly as a human made in the image of '"God"

What are your thoughts, experiences, shares?

Always stress free xo.

18 comments:

  1. So many valid points doll. So many. In the end.....love conquers all. Glad you are doing well. xx

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    1. Natasha, thanks for visit, comments and support. Xo

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  2. This is hard for me because I don't think in terms of color. When meeting people I watch actions and behaviours, and that is how I determine who I want to know, hang out with, or associate with. It has nothing to do with color. I think that you bring up great points and I wish that I knew of an answer to the problem. But other than love and respect I don't think there is one.

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    1. Nikki thanks for stopping by and commenting. I agree it is tough to discuss such a matter, I just found that as a parent I needed to get a conversation going among us moms to see what we could come up with :)

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  3. I really believe that we need an open and honest national discussion on race and ethnic background in this country. Open the ugly bag on how people are feeling and lay it all on the table.

    As far as personal experiences, I have had too many ones in my life. I am dealing with looking at the city and an area I work in as it changes and the newcomers coming in are darker than me and they are have arrived to this country in the last 20 years but they have bought into the discriminating views of the this country. I feel not wanted when I walk into a McDonald's or a grocery store near work and all the eyes are on me because I am not of a certain ethnic background.

    I have told my kids that it doesn't matter what color or where a person comes from as long as the people you associate have good character.

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    1. Patrick I always love your comments and visit. I think a national discussion sounds awesome. A day or a few days set aside where we go to our community centers, schools etc...and just talk. Hold town meetings and so forth...so many possibilities.

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  4. Such a great post! I'll never understand how there are still people in this world that would judge someone based on their race. It makes no sense to me. This really is something that needs explored by society as a whole, so that we may put an end to the hurt and discrimination that so many face.

    Thank you for sharing with us at #MommyMeetupMondays! I hope you have a fantastic week!

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    1. Brandyn thanks for stopping by, great comments. Things we need to continue discussing for sure xo

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  5. Very touching post. We do need a discussion on racism in this country, it does exist and it is real. Unfortunately racism is passed down from generation to generation. Unless it is eradicated at its core, it will always exist in this world. Even years after the Civil rights movement we still have a problem. Thanks for sharing on Sunday's Best.

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    1. Rhonda thanks for dropping by and comments. Eradicated at its core is great phrase something everyone should keep in mind.

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  6. Thank you for linking up at Turn It Up Tuesday. I'm a guest co-host this month. This post is very good. Makes us think. And you're right, things should be different. I just don't see what makes the difference what color our skin is!

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    1. Jody welcome to the TIUT family! Thanks for stopping by and commenting conversation to me is the key, I don't feel enough people are "talking" honestly about these issues.

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  7. As a Hispanic woman, adopted by Germans and married to a Norwegian, I wonder if my child will face any racism. I personally can count on one hand the number of times that I have personally been affected so I cannot understand the struggle of facing such criticism every day. I want to make sure my kids grow up aware that we are all different, but that doesn't make anybody better. I have not yet decided how I will approach the history other than with brutal honesty because I feel it is important for them to know. Thanks for sharing this thought-provoking post. I wish this wasn't even a problem in our society. #mommymeetupmondays

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    1. Jules thanks for visit. I wish there was no need for such posts myself but I take my place on this planet very seriously and believe that communication is key. As a mother I feel we can no longer rely on the history taught in books but instead we must talk with our children and research. Your child comes from an awesome mix I am glad your experience has been very few and that your child experiences the same. Sure you guys will have great chats indeed, thanks for stopping by loving MMM!

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  8. I'm loving this! I'm always so impressed by your masterpieces. Pinned and tweeted. We appreciate you taking the time to party with us. I hope to see you on Monday at 7. Happy Mother's Day! Lou Lou Girls

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    1. Thanks sweet lady! Happy Mommy day to you too! Xo

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  9. I read this earlier this week and didn't have the chance to comment on it then. I cannot tell you how much your post touched my heart. I have two biracial children and I worry about them every single day. I cringe when I see shop owners looking at one son as though he's a criminal and doesn't even give the other son a glance all because of their skin tone. It makes me so angry!!! Thanks for stopping by Sunday's Best and psst .. you've been chosen as one of our featured bloggers for Week 18!!! Congratulations!

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    1. Wow Kim thank you! I'm so grateful for your visit, your share and the support. I am saddened to hear you experience this with your family. It honestly pains me the denial our society lives in and the ignorance. I do hope that pieces such as these and more mothers start talking. Thanks again and chat soon xo

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