Goodnight my Sunshine

Good Morning! Being that Thanksgiving is right around the corner I find myself in deep thought. I am having a mommy moment. This is a share of an internal thought and conversation I had in my head the other night while I was on my walk in the park...

Hey Lil Mama it's not often I put much thought into the day you will be on your own. I pretty much decided when you entered college just to enjoy each moment and each day with you as it came with no rush. To be in the moment as best I could and soak all of you in. I can't say how grateful I am thus far to have taken that approach because time is moving so quickly.

I can't believe how much you have grown and it amazes me how focused and sure you are of yourself and your life's journey at age twenty. Some would credit your father and I and we gladly would smile and say thank you but I truly believe it is a combination of so many pieces falling into place with effort, focus, time, respect and communication.

illustration by fineartamerica.com

Sometimes I look around our home and stop at each and every picture of you and smile, you are my Sunshine.
Sometimes I go to your room and sit in your bed and smile, you are my Sunshine.
Sometimes I pick up the mess you leave behind when you rush off to work, you are my Sunshine.

I decided to take some notes on what I will and will not miss when you move out and here it is:
I will not miss...
-throwing out your garbage
-picking up the crumbs you drop on the floor
-wiping the stove down after you've used it
-hearing how the strawberries I bought are juiced up because they are huge and out of season
-how I bought you the wrong snacks
-having to replace whatever it was you forgot to tell me has finished
-worrying that you set your alarm
-reminding you to set out your laundry
-wondering if you took your umbrella
-worrying that you might injure yourself because you are always moving so fast like the Tasmanian devil
-wondering if you will take the time to organize your room
-hearing you drop things in your closet as you get ready to head out
-leaving the hallway light on when you are out late and I am heading off to bed
-texting you my whereabouts after 6pm which is the set grace period you have given me to check in after work for as long as I can remember
-doing a verbal check off list when you are packing to go away some where
-doing a verbal check off list any time you are going any where wallet check, hair clip check, gloves check, keys check

illustration by queeky.com

I will miss...
-all those things and more but what I will miss the most is our bedtime routine
For as long as you have been my child I have always tucked you into bed in one way or another. Your early years was one routine, teen years another and now another but always some sort of bonding time. I will miss those hugs and kisses for sure.

I hope that your memories of your childhood include our bedtime song...

You are my Sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy, when skies are gray
You'll never know dear how much I love you
Please don't take my Erica Sunshine away (kiss kiss kiss)
Please don't take my Erica Sunshine away (kiss kiss kiss)
Please don't take my(insert silly adjectives) Erica Sunshine aaaaaaaaaa waaaayyyyyyyyyyy (kisses and hugs)
Goodnight my Sunshine

illustration by youtube.com

Ah the journey of parenthood. Have you had these moments? Thoughts of life once your child hits a certain age? How did you deal with it or how are you dealing with it? Share your thoughts I'd love to hear.

Always stress free xo
Mari