google-site-verification: google25a08fc65649193e.html Living in Mommywood: I Quit

Sunday, October 5, 2014

I Quit

Good Morning, happy cold crisp Sunday to me in NYC.
Summer really couldn't wait to get out of here fast enough I guess, oh well.

I woke up this morning and had no real direction on where I wanted to go and then my daughter came to mind and the interesting ride she has had in the last 6 months. My daughter always inspires me to continue to ask questions of life, reason and purpose.

My daughter will be 20 years old in April and already has held 3 different types of jobs in her lifetime.

Between the ages of 13 & 15 she would temp in my office as a File clerk or do some Data entry, at the age of 16 she became the youngest Sales clerk at Aldo's shoe store and this past May she ventured  into a Leather accessories Boutique in SoHo, New York.

Every parent hopes and wishes that they raise a responsible, reliable, hard worker and I have been blessed to have those qualities in my daughter in all she applies herself too.
But unlike even some adults she also has an amazing keen sense of when it is time to let something or someone go.

Back in April after 3 years at Aldo's she comes home and says "my run there is coming to an end. I no longer feel challenged or excited about what I am doing. I no longer have the desire to give them 100% of my energy and I have gone as far as I can go in that environment." Wow, that was a bold statement. Very telling and honest. She didn't focus on the fact she would no longer have an income or that her finances would have to be readjusted no, her concern was peace of mind and growth.

She said "I no longer have the desire", how many of us have felt this way and yet still stuck things out because of need or fear? How many times in our own lives have we knowingly come to and end yet kept on pushing?

When she finished sharing all I said was "Ok, get started on cleaning up your resume, rearrange your budget, make sure you don't leave any loose ends and hand in your notice." "I never want you to settle and I never not want you to give 100%, you are still young and not tied down by bills, or life's responsibilities you don't have to stay anywhere you don't want to be."

That was the end of that, by June she said her goodbyes, shared in her tearful hugs and best wishes and within a week had found another job in the city (New York) in retail again but this time in a Boutique setting selling leather belts.
From the beginning her energy was amazing, her boss was very impressed and quickly her duties increased. She was asked to work on one of the window displays in one of the stores and being that her field of choice is Business Marketing, she was over the moon. Long story short, her boss was very  happy with the results, the display bought in some new clients, the store was generating great sales.

In the store she was originally assigned to she was one of the top Sales associates, her numbers were very impressive which wasn't a huge surprise to anyone because she did the same at Aldo's.

My daughter was very excited about the doors this position could and would open for her in her field of interest. She was in an environment that was fast paced and always growing and changing and the people she was working with all had a great team work attitude.
Her boss was always full of praise and willing to allow her to continue to explore her talents and increase her responsibilities.
Within a month she had keys to all the stores and would open and close for him at different sets of time. She just kept adding to her list of duties while still going to school and was having the time of her life.

Then she had an accident on the job. Her left hand thumb got caught in the belt snap machine and she had to be rushed to the hospital, thankfully all turned out better than expected and she has fully recovered with no reconstructive surgery needed as we first were originally told.
Her boss was amazing, he was the one who went with her to the hospital I was on grandma duties when accident happened, he stood with her long after I arrived, the worker's comp went smoothly, she was out for 4 weeks.
During that time, her co-workers and boss stayed in touch, sent her flowers, she went to visit, she rested because luckily she had no summer classes.
Which was great because she couldn't even wash her own hair, I had to help her with the most simplest of things. It was an interesting injury for sure.

She went back to work a few weeks ago, very excited bright eyed and ready to take on anything that came her way. She was commissioned to design the window displays for 2 stores they are opening in China and she was assigned to train the new sales people coming in...then things changed.

She started to come home all stressed and disappointed, she began to dread going to work and she began to show signs of negative energy.
I stopped her midweek last week and said we needed to talk.
We sat down to dinner and she shared that the store policies and managers had changed, that the store was being run in a manner that was not making use of her original responsibilities and she was just not liking what was going on.
As a parent I said "Life is not always about what you like, work is work. You are not always going to be smiling and laughing BUT you are far to young to settle. You still live here and you still have choices so again if this is not working for you and you can't give 100% get out."

She said she would give it another try and see how it went. On Saturday she goes to work and is handed a contract which she skims and doesn't 'like, she calls me to discuss the points she has issues with and I agree with her that she should bring them home, reread carefully then sign or not sign if she was not comfortable. She comes home and says the boss gave her a bit of a tude when she said she would take home to review and that he said if she didn't sign it then she could not work there.
I already knew what I was going to say next but I waited for her to comment, this is her decision not mine.

As I am preparing dinner she is pointing out her grievances the hours, the no mention of breaks, the hourly wage difference from conversations to what was in writing, how one page said one thing but the next page voided the previous page, how some of the rules were vague and how it stated that if any employee left they could not work in same field for 2 years but it wasn't specific in naming field or stores it referred too.
Now for someone who is working in marketing that could mean anything, it could mean she can't work at Mandee's or Macy's or Chanel or YSL.
That was the deal breaker for her, that was messing with her money and that was stating to her with the comment of you must sign this, no discussion that there was no negotiating, compromise or open to any talks period.

We sat down to dinner, she said "I am quitting" I said "good for you now let's eat."
She transformed into a whole different young lady after that, her energy was positive and her vibe was happy and peaceful.
She went in on Monday, spoke to her boss said her goodbyes told me her boss said he was sad to see her go but understood her position, said company policies had changed and some things were out of his hands, that she will do great in life and that she was an amazing energy in the company and would be missed but that doors would always be open to her.

This weekend she is in New Paltz, visiting some friends and Monday she will be back job hunting.

The lesson I learned in all of this is that I raised a really well rounded young woman, who knows her worth and the value of great work ethic.
That while we are young we should and must exercise all our knowledge into building in the right direction.
We as parents must encourage this from the start.
I never want my daughter to settle, to work or live a life that is not genuine.

I want my daughter to be at peace with her choices and to know I will always support her in whatever road she chooses.
Money is important, very important but not so important that you dread getting up in the morning to go make it.

We all have choices. Start living your genuine life...Today

Always stress free xo

illustration by pic


  1. Good job momma! You have raised a very smart girl there. I am sure she will find a job right away and something that she will be happy with!

  2. Thanks Jhanis! I am sure she will too, she is a go getter for sure. I am grateful she has the passion to grab life by the balls as they say lol. Thanks for visit sweetie :)

  3. So perceptive Mari, It is heartwarming to read about this wonderful mother-daughter relarionship.

    1. Thank you Jovina, I am blessed to have such an amazing human being as my child and I thank the powers above every day. Thanks for visit :)

  4. Wonderful lesson Mari! Great job!

    1. Thanks Nikki, better she learn them now then later right :) have great week thanks for visit :)

  5. I think it's great that she recognizes when she needs to find something else. It's sounds like she's at a stage in her life where she's able to explore and find what she truly likes to do! #turnituptuesday

    1. Yes I agree, I think it's wonderful time for her to explore life and all her options. #TIUT! Thanks for visit and comments:)

  6. Congrats for raising such a great daughter. Her values and drives will take her to find that one career she would love. Big bravo to her courage, to her sense of being. What a beautiful lessons to share with all of us.

    1. Maureen, thank you for visit and comments:)! I will pass on your great words to her :)

  7. So glad you linked this up on Turn It Up Tuesday. I follow you on Bloglovin, so I saw when you posted this. Love this post, and congrats on raising a daughter who has drive and courage. I only hope that my daughter grows up with the same values.

    1. Meghan, thanks for visit and comments. I'm sure if you girls build a great bond of mutual respect, communication and love you will reap great rewards! Look forward to those shares:)

  8. Life is hard enough to have a job that you don't like. I don't understand how people do it for twenty years. Working in my previous field, I would have people complain all the time how much they hated being at work, but when I suggested quitting and finding something they like, they always said they couldn't, they had great benefits or they had friends there. My response was always, then stop complaining... at least to me. Every time I have gotten tired of a job, or felt underappreciated, I have always moved on to a better job. My life is too short to be unhappy 8 hours+ a day every day. Great post. Thanks for sharing with Turn it Up Tuesday.

    1. April, thanks for visit and comments. I agree do something to change things or zip your lip at least to me lol:) chat soon I hope and love me some Tuesdays!


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