Brainsparker, a stuck writers helpful tool

Always go with you passions. 

Never ask yourself if it's realistic or not

 ~Deepak Chopra

 captured as I stood in the middle of the George Washington Bridge

One of my classmates in my writing class and writing group shared with us the other day this app called Brainsparker. It provides daily prompts to stimulate writing and encourages thinking outside the box. It helps you explore topics you would perhaps not tackle in your writing on a normal basis. For bloggers such as myself it helps greatly in those times you don't know what to write about.

It happens to the best of writers so why not accept it, embrace it and use tools to work through it.

One of my prompts this week was on Passion. On following it without question and seeing what develops. I found it funny being I was also in the middle of editing some photos and my daughter the sunshine of my life was in the middle of sketching and painting. There is always some form of expression going on in my home.

Being surrounded by things I love and people that bring a smile to my face is always what I grab on to when I need encouragement to explore my Passion.

The things that make life worth living can't always be bought.

Here's to cultivating our Passion and seeing where it leads us...

Always stress free xo

Mari

I may Loose you but I'm ok with that Too

Hello my lovelies I can't tell you enough how grateful I am for even just one of you reading my posts. Putting yourself out there on any level is difficult enough but social media is brutal. Sometimes respect, self control, self monitoring and courtesy all go out the window. I've been fortunate enough to have stayed on the more upside of things. Yes I speak my mind, I share my truths but I'm not about stepping on others toes to get my point across and I think my writing and my shares have shown you that.

I think I have chosen ways to express myself in which just about anyone can at least respect and if it's bothersome just shrug it off and move on but I have a feeling that just a tiny bit that may change.

illustration by fbwallpics.com

You see, I want to write. Huh?! What does she mean by that you may be thinking, she already writes. Yes your right and yes I do but I want to write more deeply dig my heels in and sometimes be raw. I don't want to stop writing about the subjects I already touch but what I do want to do is expand on those topics more. Sometimes I find myself holding back because I start to think "oh I can't say that or I shouldn't touch that" but why not? If I'm about starting a conversation, living stress free, clarity, respect and self love why not talk about things all things that may come to mind?

I've been a talker all my life, I've been a writer all my life too I just never gave myself permission to say that until recently. A writer uses their words for many purposes, it's the one tool that is solely ours. Comes from deep inside of us with a passion like your first real deep lingering kiss. The one that just made your head spin. Or the passion a parent feels for their child, those moments you soak up their very presence and hugging them tight allows you to feel like one. I want to write and touch that part of you.

illustration by pamhogeweide.com

Some days when I have a running thought in my head I pick up a pen and I write. My writing workshop taught me it's called writing a Stream of Consciousness. I thought about my mother the other night and this is what came out...

If I knew...
If I knew that talking with you again would bring a new conversation, I would reach out.
If I knew that offering my help would be accepted and new changes would come about, I would offer.
If I knew that opening up to you being a part of my life would not bring me misery, I'd open that door.
If I knew that dialing your number to check on you would make me smile or bring you joy, I'd call you.
If I knew that letting you know I still care and pray for you and wish we could be closer, I would say something right now.
If I knew that my efforts would be rewarded with a kind word or some gesture of appreciation, I would try again.
If I knew...

So that's just a small taste of what you may now find here. My relationship with my daughter is evolving, it's more of a mutual exchange of lessons than just me doing the teaching. This part of my journey has me really breaking down my own road with my mom and how we got to where we are today which is no connection. The lesson in that is that without communication and a willingness to grow, without respect and forgiveness, without taking responsibility for your choices in life you can push people away. You may carry unnecessary hurt and bitterness but if you decide to open up and grow together extend a hand and lean on one another you can find endless possibilities.

illustration by gallery4share.com

I'm looking forward to great chats that lead to peeling away layers of emptiness. Raw conversations about children now teaching their parents. Touching on topics that sometimes only through being a parent can we have a wider perspective. I'm hoping you continue to join me, I'm hoping you jump in and share your own story with me. I'm hoping something I say starts you thinking and questioning old ways and or thoughts. The reality is...I may Loose you but I'm ok with that Too.

Always stress free xo.

My Top Five Social Media tips

Ah Social Media! A phrase we hear so much about today. The power it holds.
Are we becoming addicted to Social Media forms and its uses?

illustration by associationacumen.com

I want to make the most of my time on Social Media.
I don't just want to be on, join it, or use it "just because".
I want to use these tools with a clear purpose.
As I was going through my emails today I noticed several things, first I want to share I have 3 emails.
One is for personal use and two for business, so it's a little time consuming when you have to sort through some crap to get to the treasures. I have a system, I check my emails 3 times a day and invest about 40 minutes tops. If you don't grab my attention on preview, I'm gone. Which led me to think of this post.

I've shared in the past my experience on Face Book facebook-who-cares-i-dont and my lack of interest for it still today.
I really don't want to crap on this form of connecting and networking but it just isn't for me.

So what are my Five tips?

-Options: Give your readers and potential followers at least three options in which they can follow you. You can't go wrong with the Email option so at least add that.
-Sharing: Here again provide at least three options and don't make me have to sign up or fill out some form to do so. Take a few extra seconds and go to your settings to set up your restrictions but don't make me jump through hoops to leave you a comment or to share something good you have posted. This is for your benefit.
-Pictures: If you want to share personal pictures, moments etc...make sure they are in good taste and clear. Blurry pictures, extra dirty kitchen, disheveled people, bathroom pics, are not attractive. These pictures will be out there forever, do you really want to show a crazy looking picture of your kitchen mess to prove a point of before and after? Does everyone need to see your kid sitting on the potty?
-Less is More: You really don't have to let us know what you are doing every second of the day.
Give me time to miss you and wonder what you are up to.
-Monetizing: For those who want to earn some cash while they Blog, great for you! But please don't just endorse everything that comes your way. When we choose to endorse something our reputation is attached, please think long term and be selective. Also please make sure your page looks appealing. A Blog page filled with pop ups and ads does not make me want to stop and read what you have to say or even look at what your selling. Think classy, think high end. Do you shop at a store that looks like a Hurricane hit it?

What do you think? Any tips on Social Media you would like to share?

Always stress free xo.

My personal studies show...the Up's and Down's of Blogging

Hello my lovelies, Once again Happy New Year.

I've put much thought into how I want to start this Blog year off so I decided to start with a study I conducted.

I like to march to my own beat but I also want to be part of a community that uplifts and provides not that takes away and spews nonsense.
I like to always learn something new that I can add to my approach to writing. One of the things I do at least once a week is read up on blogging tips. The do's and don'ts that other bloggers have shared on their journeys.

Things such as:
-layout
-Adsense info
-quantity of posts
-quality of posts
-fonts
-language
-ideas

The shares are endless some are great some are not. You have to find what can work for you and ride that train.

One thing I have found and have mixed emotions about is the advice given on commenting.

Most tips suggest that you spread the love by commenting on posts and shares you like and that this will trickle over to them in turn visiting you as well and following you (possibly).
That if you share content that you like via your social media venues, you can grow your own following as well. As the slogan of share buttons suggest...Sharing is caring.
Well this is what I have learned, this is my experience.

Yes you will get a few that reciprocate but most won't.
You will get a few thank yous after you tweet but you won't get a flood of followers.
You will nab a few new followers as you become a regular visitor to a certain page or pages but that will not guarantee growth and spread of your work.

Here is an example, I follow well over 300 plus blogs via Bloglovin. I love the variety of topics and goodies on these reads. I am always sharing great diy's, recipes, arts and crafts, quotes, information etc... and I have about 125 followers on that venue.
Now let me be clear, I follow these blogs because the content is awesome. There are so many talented women and men out there and I am more than happy to spread the love and give them some shine.
My blog is about all things stress free and easy so sharing greatness is easy. I am happy to do it I just don't want to not put spotlight on fact that some people just won't follow you back no matter how many comments you leave them, or shares.

Like minds follow like minds and depending on your content that will be the circle in which you grow in.

So moral of the story...if you comment on posts only in hopes of gaining a following don't waste your time.
Comment because you genuinely enjoyed the share or have something to say and add.

illustration by datamining.typepad.com

Things I love about blogosphere:

Finding great projects and recipes to share with others and try myself. Reading stories that inspire and teach me to be grateful about life. Connecting with total strangers that otherwise I would perhaps never get a chance to meet. The opportunity to write, not for money but because I really have loads to say and hope at least 3 people a day get to read it.
One of the ways I plan to reach those 3 people is by using the tools I found on my wonderful blog friend Antionette's page dedivahdeals.com . She shared a post with information on 30 ways to promote your blog. I already began work on bookmarking, social media and syndication expansion.
Look at for some changes real soon!

Things I love least about blogosphere?

The crap I come across that suggest the easy ways to make money off and on your page. The bashing of parenting styles I come across everyday on my reads and research. The many times I have to fill out the darn comment info just because most moms won't set up moderation of comments option. The must sign up to post a comment request, really you are turning me off with this. The many times I have to X out of all your ads just to read your post or check out your latest project share. The time I have to invest in scrolling up and down a page to find a follow option.

This is my Blog world study share. What are your experiences? Has it been what you expected? Do you have any pet peeves of your own?

Always stress free xo.

Not your Cup of Tea

Opinionated, Stubborn, Honest, Reliable, Loyal, Funny, Passionate and Loving.

These words I use to describe myself.

As July 2014 has been a trying month for me it has forced me to sit with myself and think out loud.
It has tested what I thought were pretty good plans, goals and attitude.

As my Blogging journey quickly approaches the much grateful year 1, I have come to clearly understand and slowly accept I am not everyone's Cup of Tea.

When I originally thought about sharing my parenting journey I was very excited and ready to go! I couldn't wait to touch on certain subjects or share the philosophies that had so clearly worked for me, my home, my family, my daughter.
I only saw the fun parts, I wasn't concerned with the possible negative comments and I certainly didn't care about monetary gain and to some degree still don't.
I wasn't prepared though for the slow process of growth and acceptance.

I wasn't prepared to accept that perhaps my laid back, care free, no drama, very little rules, very little craft skills was not going to be so inviting after all.
I don't go on rants about my life or use profanity to express my distaste of something or someone.
I don't complain daily, I am not a hater, I rarely touch on Fashion or Celebrities.
I can't even really pin point a downside to my 19 years of parenting except Potty Training and 19 years is a very long time in Mommywood.
I only have 1 child, I don't hate my ex's, I love my job, I don't diet, I enjoy minimal exercise and I love to eat!
I practice Yoga and Meditation, they are additions to my life that bring me peace and connect me to humanity and I prefer laughter to anything else and I believe there is a solution to any and every problem and I refuse to remain stuck.

Mind you that Blogging is filled with many many different styles and tastes, I am just highlighting a few that I have come across in Blog Mom sphere.

So what have I learned this year and why am I still here?

Well because being different is awesome. Not following the crowd is great. The women and men I have connected with have been wonderful blessings!
-I have learned how to make great new dishes, how to work with a glue gun properly, how to make my own natural face and body scrubs.
-I have learned about different cultures, I have traveled to places I may never see through the great picture shares of other mommies I follow.
-I have shared in some great First for many families, I have laughed a ton and shed few tears.
-I have been amazed at some stories and how with Faith and determination obstacles have been overcome.
-I have learned about Autism and the challenges it truly presents to each individual family.
-I have been made more aware about Sensitivity Disorders and what that exactly means.
-I live vicariously through some of these beautiful women's closets and fashion sense.
-I have learned that Mommy Blogging is filled with more good than bad so be grateful for variety and it's ok if you stop every now and then and read a rant or two.
-I have learned that all parents want the same end result...happy, healthy, loving children.
We may take different roads but we all want to get to the same place.


So I have decided to no longer concern myself with the quantity of followers I have but instead cherish, love, respect and enjoy the quality of followers I have.
No number can diminish the great life I have been blessed to travel or the countless hours of joy my daughter has bought me.
If Living in Mommywood can touch just one person, inspire that one hardheaded adult into seeing that change in attitude at any age is possible, teach one person that being a mom or a dad is not being a ruler but a guide and that communication is the door to a peaceful home and connection with our children then I have all the followers I will ever need.

No I am not everyone's Cup of Tea but I may be your Cup of Tea and I am grateful and pleased with that!!

Mommyhood has been good to me, it's taught me so many things about patience, love and acceptance.
It has taught me that we can plan and try to prepare as best we can but in the end kids have their own agendas so we have to roll with the punches.

Thanks for coming over to visit hope you stay but if you don't it's ok much love anyway...
Always stress free xoxo