Another school year is upon us.
Some of us will be letting go of our babies for the very first time, some of us will be advancing to another grade in our journeys and some of us will be crossing major milestones.
Whichever step it is we are in, they are life changers for all involved, they are character builders and a time for our parenting skills to be tested.
As I sit and talk with my own daughter and as I interact with the other babies in my life I started to think about what sort of conversations should we as parents be having in general but especially around this time of year.
I say I have many babies because not only do I have one biological daughter but many of her own friends and my own friends kids treat and see me as a second mommy.
My tool for building this trust as I always share is communication. I am a talker and I do know how to listen as if I was at their level. I still haven't forgotten I was younger once too.
So...what should we be saying this lovely start of a new school year?
These are the conversation topics I came up with:
~Mommy and Daddy are very proud of you. You are growing up and we are excited to support you in this new adventure. We will always be here for you and you are enough just the way you are.
~Not everyone will be your friend but that is ok because you should always surround yourself with people who will be nice, kind and helpful.
~Mommy (or Daddy) won't forget to pick you up, I will be right outside that door when the bell rings.
~Never be afraid to stand up for what is right, if you are uncomfortable about something speak up. Even teachers should be questioned. We are here to protect you and stand up for you always.
~No one has the right to touch you...EVER.
~Being part of the "crowd" is not your goal. Your goal is to be a leader in your own right. You are worthy of that respect.
~Being a leader does not mean be a bully. It means to learn to work with others while being true to yourself.
~Please and Thank You can go a long way.
~It's ok to cry if you get hurt or are upset about something in school. But it is very important to learn to explain and express yourself with words. Mommy and or your teacher can't understand you if you are screaming.
~Remember to ask to go to the Potty. You wouldn't want to have an accident in school but if you do we will get through it. Have change of clothes in the little ones bag...Always.
~Remember that you are a reflection of me, of us and our home so I expect you to behave accordingly.
~Don't be afraid to try new things. A new sport, a new club, talk to a new student etc...Test yourself and see what you are made of.
~This is what I expect from you this school year...be clear on your expectations and be fair. Set the rules and watch them put things into play. If they fail punish accordingly but with love and always open communication.
~A new school can be scary yes and making new friends can be too but this is a great time for you to expand your wings and add new people to your circle.
~Be clear on your definitions of Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Trust it is not the same as our kids.
~Tweak your curfew times with age as well as chores and your conversation topics should be expanding as well.
~I am here to support you I am not here to do things for you. Stay on top of your homework and other social activities.
~If you can't find balance between school and social then your social will have to be put on hold.
~Cellphones, cars, sleepovers and so forth are privileges. They can and will be taken away if rules are not followed.
~Let's be clear on our rules. They will not be changed on the spot. So if I said no makeup until your 16 I mean and meant it. Don't ask me again.
~High School and College prep are your responsibilities, plan out what it will require and you will be assisted accordingly. Set a budget for school tours, exam fees etc...
~I am your parent. I don't care what so and so parents do in their home. Don't ever compare us or disrespect us.
I can go on and on but these can surely start you talking. Lastly but not at all less important or valid is...
~Have fun!!! Don't sweat the small stuff you are only this young once. Have an awesome school year!!!
What are some of your school year conversation topics? Do you have any specific ones or do you wing it as things come along?
Always stress free xo
A Parenting and Lifestyle blog that encourages Stress free and Mindful living through Empowerment, Motivation and Inspiration.
Sunday, August 17, 2014
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Back to school...Redefined
My Lilmama (my daughter) is in college now. On Tuesday she returned to school and began her second (2) semester.
This was our Monday night...
Me- Your all set for tomorrow?
LM- Yeah, I just need to get few pencils, a pen and some new notebooks packed in my bag.
Me- Oh ok, you need anything else? You looking forward to new classes?
LM- No mama, I don't need anything else thanks I'm good. Yeah I love my schedule can't wait to check out my classes. Plus I have a class with Sonny can't wait for that (her new friend in college).
Me- Great ok glad to hear. Don't forget to set your alarm clock tonight.
LM- Ok I won't.
A few hours later I tuck her into bed (yes I still do that), we chat for a few I wish her sweet dreams and kiss her goodnight.
Tuesday morning...
LM- Ok I'm leaving now.
Me- Did you have breakfast?
LM- Yes I did, I'm good to go
Me- Ok lilmama, have great day be safe have fun. Make sure your bundled up and say hi to Sonny for me.
LM- Ok I will
Kisses and hugs and she was off to school. I stayed behind and got ready for work.
Tuesday night...
I got home after five (5), lilmama was already home. I got settled and then started to prepare dinner.
In the kitchen...
LM- So how was your day?
Me- Good, the usual. The office was quiet, caught up on some stuff. How about you, how was your first day back?
LM- Oh ok, glad you got caught up. Well my day was great. Sonny is good, everyone is good. My classes are fab, my teachers are good. I have one quirky teacher but he is great.
The next hour was full of details on her classes, what subject matters they were going to be touching, what she hoped to take away from each class, what other activities she may get into. I listened enthusiastically, commented, questioned and laughed. I was happy that she was happy.
In the end I commented...
Lilmama you shared your whole day with me without me having to really ask, so many parents wish they had what we just had and she said...
Well perhaps if they didn't attack the kid at the door, as they walked in and made them feel comfortable to share, they too could have the same. No one likes a hoverer.
I sometimes think back to her younger back to school day experiences, the school supplies shopping, the clothes shopping, the new challenges, the increase in responsibilities, the getting her book bag ready, the setting of the alarm, the adjusting of our daily lives to accommodate one another and I say out loud...thank heavens we survived all that. Glad you don't need me to help you as much any more and we both laugh.
Happy back to school, lilmama xoxo
Then

Now
This was our Monday night...
Me- Your all set for tomorrow?
LM- Yeah, I just need to get few pencils, a pen and some new notebooks packed in my bag.
Me- Oh ok, you need anything else? You looking forward to new classes?
LM- No mama, I don't need anything else thanks I'm good. Yeah I love my schedule can't wait to check out my classes. Plus I have a class with Sonny can't wait for that (her new friend in college).
Me- Great ok glad to hear. Don't forget to set your alarm clock tonight.
LM- Ok I won't.
A few hours later I tuck her into bed (yes I still do that), we chat for a few I wish her sweet dreams and kiss her goodnight.
Tuesday morning...
LM- Ok I'm leaving now.
Me- Did you have breakfast?
LM- Yes I did, I'm good to go
Me- Ok lilmama, have great day be safe have fun. Make sure your bundled up and say hi to Sonny for me.
LM- Ok I will
Kisses and hugs and she was off to school. I stayed behind and got ready for work.
Tuesday night...
I got home after five (5), lilmama was already home. I got settled and then started to prepare dinner.
In the kitchen...
LM- So how was your day?
Me- Good, the usual. The office was quiet, caught up on some stuff. How about you, how was your first day back?
LM- Oh ok, glad you got caught up. Well my day was great. Sonny is good, everyone is good. My classes are fab, my teachers are good. I have one quirky teacher but he is great.
The next hour was full of details on her classes, what subject matters they were going to be touching, what she hoped to take away from each class, what other activities she may get into. I listened enthusiastically, commented, questioned and laughed. I was happy that she was happy.
In the end I commented...
Lilmama you shared your whole day with me without me having to really ask, so many parents wish they had what we just had and she said...
Well perhaps if they didn't attack the kid at the door, as they walked in and made them feel comfortable to share, they too could have the same. No one likes a hoverer.
I sometimes think back to her younger back to school day experiences, the school supplies shopping, the clothes shopping, the new challenges, the increase in responsibilities, the getting her book bag ready, the setting of the alarm, the adjusting of our daily lives to accommodate one another and I say out loud...thank heavens we survived all that. Glad you don't need me to help you as much any more and we both laugh.
Happy back to school, lilmama xoxo
Then
Now
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