No Time for It!

Happy Hump day my lovelies! Some of us are still working around mounds of snow others enjoying the sun. However we are dealing with our day I wanted to ask you some questions.

illustration by amazon.uk.co

Are you doing everything in your power daily to live your life to its full potential? Are you focused on you and not on someone else? Have you been looking at yourself in the mirror and tearing away at the layers of junk you have accumulated? 

I am finding that more and more of us are not living up to our full potential because we waste our time on things that just don't concern us. Things that when all is said and done won't have helped us get to our destination.

I had a very unpleasant experience recently I'd like to share. I find that when I talk through certain things I gain more clarity. Women I want to say that our reputation for being catty will only continue to be our downfall. There is nothing attractive in projecting our short comings on someone else. I wish we wouldn't prove people right with some of the things we so happen to engage in. Case in point gossip and spiteful behavior.

I've commented in the past that I don't allow very many people in my close circle and deal even less with women because of the tearing down one to bring up the other actions. Yes not all women are like this I know but sadly more are than not. I've experienced many things in my years but being blamed for breakup of relationships hasn't been one. Until recently when I've become the scapegoat for someone else's personal issues. As if my existence on this planet altered their circumstances, their choices and the outcomes.To give me such power is disturbing to say the least.

my daily reminder that TIME is precious so I make sure I NEVER waste it

I will only say this as I say it each and every time...You and only you are responsible for your life. Every action you take brings about the next outcome. Every word that comes out of your mouth brings forth numerous reactions. Your choices have consequences. Look in the mirror first before you start looking around and pointing the finger.

As a parent my responsibility has been to teach my daughter to be careful with her actions and own up to her choices. To set an example of mindful living and respectful communication. To use her Time wisely. Talking about people and spreading rumors, causing drama and chaos are a waste of time and energy. I've taught her to be supportive of her friends but not to get involved in the he said she said and that in every story there are three sides two the accounts of those involved and one the truth.

illustration by elynenoir.deviantart.com

As a woman I follow the same path. Tend to yours and don't involve anyone else. No one makes anyone do anything they don't want to do. Take responsibility for what you have bought to the table and focus on your plate. Its unfortunate anyone would place blame on another for their situations let alone sole blame. Its also unfortunate that adults would stoop to childish actions to somehow resolve the matter. I am only interested in dealing with my journey and reaping the rewards of its outcome. So I hope everyone else feels the same about themselves as well.

Music as always came to the rescue! I heard this song on the same day that my scapegoat drama blossomed and after processing and looking for clarity one thing is for sure. I am not wasting one moment on someone else's journey of discovery. I am not interested in engaging in blame games when I have my own life to manage. Do you boo.

Thank you Fantasia for this great Anthem at a time when other people's energy is invading my space

No Time for It!

"you feel some type of way

 she got s*** to say

 they gon' say some things that don't do nothing

 but remind me and if they're bringing up problems

 there's no time for it

 I don't care for gossip what they gonna say? "

What do you think, is it ever ok to place blame on someone else when things go wrong in your life? Do you feel that what someone else does needs to affect your life's outcome? Is it not up to us as individuals to access our own lives and make the choices that will bring about our own happiness? Does it make you weaker or stronger to give another power over your own journey?  Hummm so much to think about but what a great conversation to have with ourselves.

Always stress free xo

Mari

Brand New Me

Happy Thursday! Well I didn't even come close to winning the Power Ball, how about you? I will say it was fun picturing all the things I would do if I won. I was inspired to get my butt moving just a little bit faster.

Today I want to bring music back into Mommywood with a great Alicia Keys song...Brand New Me.

When I first heard this track back in 2012 it personally touched me because of things that were happening in my life at the time. I have often mentioned how much I love music and the roll its played in my life. It brings me such joy and peace no matter how loud or slow the song I can always find a message to take away.

The year of its release I cut off over 10 inches of hair for donation, I broke up with who I thought at the time was my partner for life, I began my Yoga and Meditation practices, I began to teach myself French and I began my full time journey into Volunteer work. One was to keep a promise and gain a fresh start (cutting my hair) the others were coping tools for the pain I was feeling at the time but turned into lifetime treasures. No pain lasts forever, in time it just becomes less and you learn to put your focus on the now and not the then.

if I talk a little louder

if I speak up when you you're wrong

if I walk a little taller

I've been under you too long

if you noticed that I'm different

don't take it personally

don't be mad, it's just the Brand New kind of Me

it took a long long road to get here

it took a Brave Brave girl to try

I've taken one too many excuses one too many lies

don't be surprised, oh see you look surprised

hey, if you were a friend, you want to get to know me again

if you were worth a while

you'd be Happy to see Me smile

I'm not expecting sorry

I'm too busy finding myself

I got this

I found me, I Found me!

lyrics by Alicia Keys & Emeli Sande

 I heard this song today on my drive to work and I smiled. It no longer reminded me of the pain I felt back then or the changes I was going through but instead it made me smile because I made it. I am here and I am a Brand New Me.

Don't allow life's obstacles to get in the way of you living and growing. Take it one day at a time but keep going. There is a big bright smile just around the corner. Intimate relationships test us, they allow us to figure out if we can join with another and grow. I say this goes for all relationships. So the next time something in your life ends...make sure you come out the other said a Brand New You.

What do you think?

Always stress free xo

Mari

And I wasn't Disappointed

Happy Hump day!!! Picture me blowing a horn. Some are complaining about the heat wave we are in the middle of but noooooo not me. Bring it on, I just finally was able to erase those memories of shoveling my car out of the snow. I am making the most of this summer regardless what comes my way and speaking of what has come my way....

illustration by rapxclusive.com

I had a great opportunity not to long ago to take a break from my grandma duties if even for a few hours and go meet one of my man crushes. I have several but this one has been on going since 1999.
He is as beautiful on the inside as he is on the outside and talking to and with him is inspiring, uplifting, informative and freeing. I was fortunate enough to meet Tyrese!!!
Yes ladies, that Tyrese sing to me "Lately", kiss on me "Baby Boy", shot down the Decepticon's in "Transformer's movies", drive fast and say the silliest things "Fast and Furious franchise" Tyrese!

illustration by entertainmentrocks.com

I got the chance to join him at a meet and greet in Brooklyn thanks to a friend of mine. What a blast.
He discussed several things, he really is a talker but I am too so I didn't mind. It beats meeting someone you have admired and them turning out to be a total jerk. He shared his journey spoke about family, love, life, and being comfortable with who you are once you have found clarity. He spoke about his music and his acting career, his passion for new possibilities and of course his love and respect for Paul Walker. He shared his views on parenting and the importance of Co-Parenting in a civil manner. His court struggles and the disservice bitter x's project on their children. I even asked questions about the songs on his new album (which btw I totally love) and I wasn't disappointed.
He answered mine and every other question very specifically and clear.

illustration by 5startracks.com

illustration by blackcelebkids.com

Ladies he confirmed that with anything in life as long as you have great communication anything is possible. There are great men and women out there you just have to know what you want and put yourself in the place to find them. And his smile is not bad at all, it truly melts you away. I was happy to have been a part of his last album promotional stops. When you decide to end something important in your life it should reflect the love you had for it and the joy it bought you. It should be the best you have to offer and this album totally reflects all of that and more.

compliments of 103.9 in NYC yes that's me on the right!!!

Tyrese, thank you for sharing your space with me and with so many others. It has been a pleasure to watch your growth and development. I look forward to your future endeavors for I know you still a lot more to offer this world.

So lovelies if you get the opportunity to meet someone you have loved from a distance I hope you grab it with both hands and I hope it isn't a disappointment.

Always stress free xo.

Bag Lady

Music can heal the deepest of wounds if you just take the time to listen. Be it Rock, Country, R&B, Instrumental, Salsa or Pop. I am a lover of all music. While in my office I am blessed to be able to spend my time there with my music playing. No one dictates what genre I can listen to. It's just me in my space.

I use a variety of options to move me through what I may be feeling at that moment. If I think about for example, my journey with my feelings and interactions with my family over the years I log into my Spotify and listen to Frank Sinatra's "My Way". If I am feeling nostalgic about my H.S. years I go on You Tube and play Freestyle music and say hello to Judy Torres and TKA. If I am thinking about how in life we put undo pressure on ourselves that bring us pain and discomfort I visit my girl Erykah Badu's "Bag Lady". My musical ride is a blast for sure.

Today I am going to ride with "Bag Lady". If you aren't familiar, no worries I will include video so you can take a listen. On this song Erykah Badu is speaking to a "Bag Lady" but listen carefully to her word play. With lines like "one day all them bags gon' get in your way" or "pack light" or "you can't hurry up 'cause you got too much stuff". For years I would rock to that song, I loved it so and I enjoy her music in general but it wasn't until a few years ago that I listened to what she was saying.

As we grow older we carry some history. We hope that some parts of that history don't hinder us or stain us in some ways but unfortunately at times it can and it does. We meet people that add to our history that at times don't leave good things behind when they are gone and we walk away carrying that load. We go in and out of a variety of relationships with bags that can totally be dumped. Sometimes our own attitude and views can add to that load.

Healing from any lose or from years of negative chatter is a process. It's part of the road to reaching freedom from those "bags" You can't rush through it, you can't push it aside, you have to sit with it and sort through the bad to get to the good "pack light".

Today, when you approach a situation that may bring you discomfort, try changing the way you handle it. Sometimes our old ways get in the way. Tweak your approach, "pack light". Lighten your load so you can move about with more ease and a bigger smile.

What do you think? Have you ever experienced being the "Bag Lady"?

Always stress free xo.

My Queen is back! Mary J. Blige's The London Sessions Review

No amount of words can describe the love I have for Mary. Yes I call her Mary or MJB, that's how closely connected I feel to her and to everything she represents.

She is that friend you have that doesn't need words exchanged to know where you are coming from or how you feel.

Her songs have been my source of strength on many days of my life.

I remember clearly the first time I heard her voice it was the summer of "92" and the song was "Love no Limit" from her debut album "What's the 411?". I was in the back seat of my friends car and everything stopped.


"Baby, there's no need to tell ya, as far as I can clearly recall

My love has been here for you so you don't have to worry at all

I'll sacrifice my time, I'll make sure you're satisfied

And it's no hard thing to the joy I'll bring, I wanna give you all of my love"


Those words! Those sentiments were exactly how I was feeling about my future partner and baby daddy.! I was hooked.

Here we are 22 years later, 2 relationship chapters closed and her songs still ring near and dear to my heart.

I had the amazing opportunity through The BLink Marketing Network & TapInfluence to get a first listen at her latest creation The London Sessions and omg I was blown away. Twelve new songs, great new beats, awesome vibe and heart stopping lyrics!

A few of her latest songs for example "Nobody But You" have a great dance beat sort of club/ disco-ish fantastic and the lyrics again as strong as thought provoking as ever. You are on an emotional roller coaster from start to finish.

Another song "Pick Me Up" has the line "misery loves company" and I just had to jump off my seat!

The single they are playing on the radio "Whole Damn Year" to me is right up there with how I felt listening to "Share My World-I Can Love You 1997".

Powerful. That is the word I choose to describe her latest work. I felt like I was part of a journey through the discovery of expressing your voice. Of finally speaking to be heard and the achievement of clarity in life.

"Worth My Time" is another cut that bought me down memory lane of past relationships. Great lyrics strong emotions.

Mary you are Today Tomorrow & Always to me, My Queen. I can only wish that you continue to grace me and the world with your talent and genuine love. You are a true artist in all its meaning. Wish you great success here's another one!!!

I participated in the Mary J Blige The London Sessions album review program as a member of bLink Marketing Network. I was provided a free album to review but all opinions are my own.